Pic of the month: What tf does a composer have to do….?
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© 2009 Irina Antonovna Shostakovich/Artistic Director Oksana Dvornichenko
Captions:
1 Which is it, Svetlanov: The dog ate your score, or you left it with Brezhnev’s girlfriend?
2 They are serving WHAT for lunch in the canteen?
3 You’re telling me Mourinho’s still manager of Man. United?
Look, Dmitri, it’s a fine way to sign off your symphonic cycle, but you do know that ‘Tristan’ is still in copyright, yes?
My fly on the wall – she’s very old now – tells me that was because DS suddenly remembered he was cooking some milk at home while his wife was on an expedition to find some eggs in town.
Sorry to bother you, Mitya, but I’ve just checked my phone and I thought you’d like to know Zenit just missed TWO penalties. Can you believe that?
“I’m sorry maestro….the West is full of useful idiots too.”
Dmitri, comrade Stalin hates your latest symphony….you know what that means?!
“But Dmitri…also missing with Gauk’s suitcase was his BEST pair of shoes….”
He had just been informed that it was David Oistrakh’s 59th birthday — and here he had gone and written the Violin Concerto No. 2 thinking it was a lovely 60th birthday present. “Damn, now I’ll have to compose a violin sonata or something just so I’m not the only one at the party without a 60th birthday present for him.”
“What do you mean, I am Jewish?” My family, Shostak, is related to him, through his ancestry from Belarus. No documentation exists thus far, but that doesn’t matter, because these things were hidden.
“I coulda had a V-8!”
Can’t they read my metronome marking? Its 144 to the half note! Not 144 to the quarter note!!!! My music is not meant to be comfortable!!!