Dear Alma, I’m a white, male, 30ish conductor. What hope?
OrchestrasDear Alma,
I am a male conductor in my mid-30’s. My career seems to have stalled. I started with several high-level assistant posts, then moving to a regional orchestra as director and some prestigious guest engagements. But over the past 3 years, those calls dried up. I was thinking my regional orchestra was a stepping stone, but my applications for better orchestras are rejected. Should I just find a way to be happy in what I have. It’s not enough for a living, that’s for certain. I am not unhappy. Just a little confused when I see younger (mostly female) conductors getting the positions I am applying to.
Passed Over
Dear Passed Over,
Reading your query, the biggest take-away is that you may have found happiness. That is a rare and powerful thing, and possibly the most important thing a human can achieve. Let’s hold onto that while we look at your situation.
A couple of questions come to mind, which can help you decide you next steps.
Are you satisfied in your current position, and do you know if the musicians, management, and audience are happy?
Is your contract secure, and does it give you a reasonable number of years at your current position?
Are you appropriately challenged in your work?
Do you like where you live, do you have a social network?
Do you yearn for a higher position, more travel and prestige?
If you stay where you are, what are the options to augment your financial situation (teaching position, adding another conducting position at a non-competing orchestra)?
If you find your answers to be quite satisfied, look into finding a way to expand your role in your community or try to add another similar-level orchestra within a reasonable distance.
If you find your answers to be unsatisfied, search for feedback about your rejected applications, your current work environment, and then take action to make yourself more attractive to both, perhaps adding a consortium commission, creating invigorating and press-worth projects, starting a conducting seminar, or simply furthering your own education (which can be done in many ways).
Passed Over, I urge you to block out any outside forces which can affect your own happiness, and find your true feelings. It is a rare thing that career and happiness align – we often choose one or the other. In you case, perhaps you have found both.
Questions for Alma? Please put them in the comments section or send to DearAlmaQuery@gmail.com
Hang tough- many of those female conductors will quit to have babies/a life and the lifer male conductors will take their places if still in the game.
Thanks for the nice comment. It’s good to know why the jobs are impossible to keep after we repopulate the human race. How would your mother feeling she knew you wrote this?
Dear Passed Over Conductor
Lets face it you are toast. Or past your sell by date.
Sadly the reality that you may not be any good has eluded you.That the amazing musicians in the orchestra find you somewhat dull and groan every time they see you on the roster.
So this is a time to go away and find a new role in life. Perhaps a commentator for Slipped Disc or a middle manager where you can join the other losers complaining that its not the fact they are duff its the fact they are male , pale and stale that means they are being ignored.
Stop being such a snowflake.
Haha,
Seems like the above slipped disc commentator just set a new bar for the most bitter and spiteful comment in Slipped Disc’s history! That’s something that takes talent.
He’s done for, unless he disguises himself as a diverse female from unexpected cultures.
Sally – you surely must see that being a woman in a man’s world is not all puff pastry and crème brûlée! It’s been hard enough for Sally to get ahead, please can you give us a little credit?
The writer does not state that he is white.
This rather reeks of anti-EDI trolling? Surely not on Slipped Disc Music ….
It’s a really topic, and you are blind to not see it.
White men playing the race card. I never thought I’d live to see the day!
Dear Passed Over, welcome to the club ,and this from a conductor more than twice your age. Just remember you are not only a conductor but a musician as well. I’m guessing that you have advanced keyboard skills or maybe an orchestral instrumentalist ,so why not engage in playing chamber music recitals with friends and colleagues. This should help you promote even more your reputation as a true conductor/musician.
Orchestral players have a lot of respect for conductors who not only wield a baton but also engage in ensemble playing. And maybe from there you might be able to build your own chamber orchestra. Teaching is also very rewarding.
Good luck!
This is good, solid advice. Thank you, Robert!
If this were genuine then the simple answer would be that if you’re good enough you’ll make it. Plenty of average to poor conductors make a living too.
Or take the full on entrepreneur route and found your own ensemble
Graham – yes agreed. This writer needs to take things by the horns a bit more if he wants to succeed.
Let John Eliot Gardiner inspire you.
Or Emanuelle Haim, Laurens Equilbey, William Christie … or the late great Nikolaus Harnoncourt. Go for baroque!
The worst thing that can happen right now to an aspiring conductor is being white, cis-gender, heterosexual, and European / US-American. This positive-action pro-female conductors fashion is only causing discrimination of males and giving access to the profession to most of the – still tiny – pool of female conductors (there aren’t many female conducting students), most of whom would not have had a career without all the “female – first” measures.
Not just conductors. Try getting a book published if you are a cis white male. Or female, for that matter.
Or a whole raft of other jobs and circumstances (grants, prizes, etc.).
V Lind, are you saying with a straight face that the only books published nowadays are by non-heterosexual women? What a strange world you must live in.
Another SD news item reports that the six finalists in the Montreal piano competition are all male. Presumably all gay!
My new book was immediately accepted by CSP but only after many offers to other publishers who rejected it because of lacking enough social justice support, or because having been written by a European postbrexit male. One American publisher even wanted to take it on, on the condition that the passages about ‘woke’ would be either omitted or entirely rewritten into the opposite direction.
One publisher explained they would take it on if it were written by an African.
Discouraged, for a moment I contemplated to offer it under the name of my PA but she refused, because reading it gave her too much stress.
https://www.cambridgescholars.com/product/978-1-5275-5314-9
Frau! There are but a few Frauen leading orkestras – surely you know this! It makes the headlines because it is unique, not ubiquitous. Discrimination of males. Oh my. I can’t wait to see that day when that ACTUALLY happens!
Don’t underestimate the negative effects a female conductor can have on male players. A female collegue player you can ignore by simply not looking at her, but a female conductor you have to watch attentively. A research project by Dr Hofstadter of the Texas Institute of Technology last year has shown that since females have begun leading orchestras, the number of therapists’ patients has increased proportionally. It seems that the feeling of being dominated, led, inspired, stimulated by a female conductor can cause serious inferiority complexes, identity problems, inner conflicts, and increase the chance for neurotic symptoms during rehearsels and concerts, like uncontrollable jerks in the arm muscles, with a devastating effect on trombones, percussion and strings.
Unfortunately I agree with you completely. I say unfortunately because this is a big problem right now in the industry, and we all see a lot (really a lot) of inferior female conductors hyped by PR-agencies, press and some deaf orchestras’ managers (maybe they are not so deaf but slaves of the press and of the mainstream). I also hear from many agents that they are being specifically asked for a female conductor not matter who. But this is a sign of our times: political correctness (whatever it might mean) is more important than quality, youth more important than experience, visibility more important than deepness, “energy” more important than skills and knowledge. And since you cannot judge a conductor from his (or her) wrong notes – like a soloist or a singer – and only few can understand if he (or she) has a good technique, the mainstream decides. There are maybe only a handful of good female conductors around, and even some of the most hyped ones are just mediocre, praised because of their “energy”, or “freshness”. I always believed (and I still do) that musicianship is a bit more complicated than just being energetic or fresh….. Am I wrong?
No, you are not wrong, on the basis of my own experience you are absolutely right.
No you are entirely right.
It has also much to do with the culture in a broader sense: the wrapping paper can more easily be ‘judged’ than content.
I think it is not true to say there are not many female conducting students but of course I can only speak for my own experience. In my teaching I have seen a huge increase over the last ten years and now have a rough balance. What is so deeply frustrating is that this is an industry (and I mean industry, it is not a profession with any form of standards) where genuine expertise and experience have no relevance or value at any level. That position applies regardless of race or sex and in my view presents an existential threat to the art form.
All-too-often people short on essential talent, insight, skill and experience are promoted over those with all of those because those with the power to hire and fire are too ignorant concerning the position concerned and too much influenced by politics or other agendas. That is the nature of business and conducted music, over the last 50 years, has become nothing more.
If you want to know why, follow the money. The following article also offers some clues: https://conductorslament.org/
I was told by a well-known (now former) artistic director of a prominent orchestra in Europe that he could engage me with the orchestra for my art and craft. However, he explained that currently, what is in “demand and fashion”, doesn’t align with who I am. He suggested that if I were younger and/or female, it would be much easier to engage me for a ‘trial’ in a family or community concert. Essentially, he conveyed that my age, sex, and physical appearance make it very difficult to “sell me” to audiences, as I am not considered ‘interesting enough’ or a ‘novelty’ [white male European conductor]… and that without even seeing me work with the orchestra! He also said that there is pressure to engage females and minorities, because often arts organizations get more funding if they are perceived as an organization that engages more women and racial minorities.
This is one of the results of classical music being considered a ‘business’. It is utterly materialistic, while music is the most immaterial of all art forms.
I am in exactly, but exactly the same situation 🙂
Just about to change careers though, I can’t take it anymore.
Good! The Natural Selection is doing its job!
Natural selection doesn’t have a “job”. It’s not assigned or intended.
Good idea, Same! Sounds like a plan. Looks for something new if you are unhappy.
Did you go into this wearing a blindfold? If you were committed to the art form as opposed to making a career you might be looking at other ways forwards.
Flame war bait.
“Younger (MOSTLY FEMALE) conductors getting the jobs” ???
Are you high, Normy? I mean, are you really SO divorced from the gross misogyny currently being revealed in the classical world, despite being lauded as a current music critic? Read the room and perhaps do a deep dive into the ratios of women to men in any positions of power in our lofty music institutions – and do an article on that.
And don’t tell me that that nonsense is a real Dear Alma letter. Poppycock.
Yet more seeming b/s! What? Absolutely no mention of agents? How did he get those more prestigious engagements? Off his own bat? Perhaps, but it is surely unlikely. And does he actually have an agent? Does he expect to move up the ladder without one merely by being good at his job? And how many good conductors actually succeed by means of application, I wonder? As for career and happiness rarely aligning! That surely is highly questionable!
Nick2 – we missed you in the last 2 Alma’s. Glad to see you back, huffing and puffing. I bet this poor sap has lost his agent as well. Certainly sounds as if he is adrift without a rutter.
Let’s be clear, Passed Over. The reason you’re not getting jobs has nothing to do with affirmative action for women.
Young white males continue to land the top orchestra jobs: Klaus Mäkelä! And the chief conductor or music director of virtually every major U.S. and European orchestra is a while male.
If you’re now in a place thinking that your career has plateaued because of gender politics, you’re only going to become more and more bitter.
In arts, like sports, not everyone is destined to be a super star. And I get it — it hurts to get so close and then realize this about yourself, and that you won’t be able to do any better.
“Young white males continue to land the top orchestra jobs: Klaus Mäkelä!”
Um, you just named one, and one only.
Dear White Male Conductor,
Never fear! For in the US, only 10 percent of music directorships are held by women, a figure that has held since the 1990s. All of these women conductors that you see are young assistants, and you’ve already done that, and guest conductors who are temporary, but can make the organization look “woke” when they are far from it. You have a chance! Your challenge is simply to rise above the mediocre field of male conductors of regional orchestras. Study, study, study! Expand your palette exponentially, and maybe you’ll get somewhere!
Good luck!
Many reasonably decent young conductors, in North America at least, find themselves in precisely this situation after a while. They confidently dream of getting music directorships of the greatest orchestras, but that’s for but a select few. The competition is intense, and like everything in life, it’s a pyramid. Talent isn’t spread equally, and if you aspire to be the next Leonard Bernstein, you have to have the goods. The exceptional ones are very very few and far between, but egos are everywhere.
So why wouldn’t an orchestra pick an OK female conductor over an OK male one? Can’t blame them. Looks great on paper and attracts positive publicity.
Great talent is hard to hide – if you’re amazing at what you do, you’ll be fine. But there’s a lot of honest, hard-working people who just aren’t there. Such is life. Of course, it’s more comfortable to blame systems and conspiracies.
Women do it regularly too these days – apparently, the only reason why half of Music Directors in the world aren’t women is a conspiracy by men. There’s a female Gergiev and Dudamel and Petrenko and Barenboim and Salonen and Rattle right now, but men have ganged up against them so they’re toiling in obscurity.
Excuse me, can you tell me who those female Gergiev, Petrenko, Barenboim, Salonen and Rattle are? (not talking about Dudamel because he doesn’t really belong in that group – and btw I have seen several ones imitating him lately). I don’t see a single one female conductor of that level, unfortunately.
Become a minority.
What, you mean move to London?
He might ask himself if he’s pushing his orchestra to improve, tackling more challenging pieces, etc.
Sometimes he may be constrained by the orchestra’s budget, but if the group can improve, that may help get himself noticed also, which can help lead to more guest conducting opportunities.
Precisely what Alma suggests. If you want to get ahead, work for it and make a difference! Be bold and courageous.
If it weren’t for Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion, bitter mediocrities would have no one to blame.
I am just as confused at seeing the disproportionate attention female conductors receive in the press and at blogs. And I wouldn’t be surprised if many female conductors feel frustrated at how little attention their art attracts, and how much more attention is focused on their gender.
I found it so refreshing when Karina Canellakis made clear, ahead of an interview, that she would only answer one question about gender. Way to go.
Canellakis is a smart young woman and a skilled musician. One of the better female conductors for sure. But thirty years ago she couldn’t have done the career she is doing now, and not because she is a woman, but because she, at least when she started conducting, lacked a lot of skills. Other female conductors made a career thirty years ago because they were skilled and because they had a serious background (e.g. Jane Glover, Simone Young, Susanna Mälki), which only few of today’s young conductors have (males and females).
Gender aside, don’t most conductors start with limited skills and learn on the job? Or are you suggesting that Canellakis’ skills were lacking even by the standards of novice conductors?
If you are right about Canellakis’ early days, I find it remarkable that she is managing to mature under the spotlight. We don’t often see that.
You are right Mr. Linardos, she is remarkable because she is – I know her personally – a hard worker. But don’t forget that she is an accomplished violinist, who used to play in many orchestra, if not professionally (Akademie der Berliner Philharmoniker). Nevertheless, 30-40 years ago a different level of experience was requested, in order to be invited by important organisations (opera houses and orchestras). Conductors like Simone Young, Christian Thielemann, Donald Runnicles, Fabio Luisi etc. all had a long and specific experience as coaches in opera houses. Others, like Sebastian Weigle, played for years in major orchestras. That was the kind of experience – which brings knowledge and understanding – needed before starting a conducting activity. Very few are born as a conductor: Dudamel maybe, or Harding: great talents who lack deepness and musical gravitas. We will see what time will tell about all those news “geniuses” (Mirga, Mäkelä, Stasevska, Peltokoski etc.).
I forgot Manfred Honeck, who played for years in the VPO before starting his successful career as a conductor.
@Observer: And Anne Manson.
What is this drivel?
Conducting is a tough business. It seems that if one hasn’t made it by age 30 he’ll never get there. The competition for what few jobs are out there is fierce. There’s a nearby semi-pro orchestra that only does six concerts a year and pays lousy. When it announced a conductor search a few months ago they received 120 applications within days and more come in all the time. The board has made it clear they are considering DEI over everything else; musicianship be damned. A woman (trans or real), gay, black/Latinx applicant is ranked highly. White or Asian guys – forget it. Unless…you have a heavy European accent!
As the ‘WOKE’ society drags the Arts down globally, I seriously fear that you have much chance other than with an Orchestra with Courage. So Sad but I say that in all seriousness.
Unfortunately, as a white, straight (I Assume) male you have no chance ! Just look at a modern orchestra, how many grey haired men do you see? Things have changed!
Let’s hope they have changed! Not soon enough for the 51% of the world though. Read the comments and you will see this is true. Waiting for women to have babies and drop out of work so men can get their jobs. Disgusting.
Re: “Nancy N”
Saying my comment about waiting for some of the women to have babies/other priorities and drop out is disgusting should explain why? I didn’t say that anybody was making them do this or that they should do this, just that some *will* do this which is just how things are, not controversialism.
Are you saying that women *shouldn’t* do this because it would be terrible if men replaced them, and that female conductors should forget about anything else they might ever want in life, if they become successful?
“Your Mom” of course they can keep the jobs if they want, but the fact is many choose not to, or to work much less often.
Declare yourself as transsexual, n overnight you’ll be declared a transformative conductor who will bring unique n penetrating interpretations of music to a wider n more engaged audience in a reimagined, inclusive n equitable world.
Non binary. For transsexual they might ask for proof, and that can be painful
Can you actually name any trans conductors? Nonbinary conductors? The hysteria over virtually nonexistent populations threatening conducting positions and the whole of Western Art Music is rather ludicrous.
The casual transphobia here is alarming. Also, it’s spelled “and”.
Agreeing with Woman Conductor in a different comment–what trans conductors??? I wish we had some.
Norman,
Is this humour, an acid criticism, or a real exchange ?
In any case, preferring a conductor application should be strictly based on performance.
In other words: Don’t worry, be happy, just ignore the elephant in the room!
Dear Passed Over
Unfortunately you appear to have fallen for the common misconception that the business of conducting has any connection with the profession of conducting. Unfortunately, the former has nothing whatsoever to do with music or art, it is merely a branch of the fashion industry.
You may have found some early success because in the fashion industry there is always some kind of appetite for hot young things – and this can even encompass those who might be male and white. Now that you have passed that stage, however, you have discovered that white, male, 30ish conductors are simply not fashionable.
Fortunately, it is possible to serve the cause of music in all kinds of situations. Just continue to do this, build and refine your skills and work towards the day when the musical world comes to understand that this is a profession where skill and experience have real value and that allowing brilliant musicians to be directed by people lacking the requisite skills can only be a recipe for disaster. After all, even if it does not there will still be no need to worry because the entire industry is going to collapse.
I’m about the same except in my 40s now. I used to think that minorities are given more opportunities for orchestras to score EDI points, that I am at disadvantage, that the world is against me etc etc. but lately I am asking myself: so what? They were suppressed all throughout history so trying to give them a chance is not the end of the world. And some of them are outstanding artists. There are a lot of white male straight conductors who are really not that great either…Anyways, does this whole situation have to stop me to strive to be better, to bring the best out of the score, to be inspired and to help young artists, composers etc.? absolutely not. The fact that someone else is given a priority shouldn’t concern me because we are all artists on our own. The biggest question for me is how do I bring more value to what I do? and not only to myself but to everyone around. And yes I’m 40 but I look forward to be 50 and 60 because I will have so much more to bring to the table then. I’m not a young conductor anymore but is it his a bad thing? I don’t think so. Just don’t give up but rather take time to think and assess objectively how you can improve. Also, you are a music director! No matter how small, you can do extraordinary things with your organization. Bring value my friend and don’t expect anything in return and the more value you bring the more opportunities you will get.
I was told to “create your own opportunities.” And I’m a white, middle class American woman.
None of us are entitled to an international conducting career in our thirties, honey. If you didn’t excel at a young age, the traditional path just isn’t going to happen for you. And if you didn’t grow up wealthy it probably was never going to work out, anyway.
You should be grateful you even had a chance to work with professional regional orchestras. Sounds like you had every opportunity to make things happen and you failed to achieve that. And at least nobody ever attributed your modest success to your race or gender, rather than your ability.
Dear Alma,
What rubbish advice!
How many other columnists would tell a 30 year old to stick with a profession where they can’t earn a living simply because they are “not unhappy”?!
After a long 4 years of DEI concepts and programming in the arts, the serious data point to the same result (much of the same data is being used in other fields to either dismantle or attempt to “refine” so-called DEI policies).
Most peer-review studies show DEI policies are really bad for business, and actually exacerbate the situation for the people they are supposedly trying to help, plus these policies create a much more toxic work environment overall, since DEI policies (in general) are inherently racist since they are based on factors such as skin color, ethnicity, and gender instead of merit or quality. In the conducting industry, if you’re a white male over 25 (and not from Finland), you’re pretty much toast before the process even starts, especially if it’s an academic post.
Btw KM is extraordinarily gifted and was the overwhelming choice by CSO members and upper admin after only his second visit way back when.
Of course there is also the possibility that you’re not a very good conductor, which most decent orchestras can figure out within 15 min. or so.
This is the reality which is only one reason the biz is in such bad shape now. Until orch admins and Boards somehow get a clue and hire better execs, change their thinking and people start filling seats again, expect many arts institutions to either shrink exponentially or simply disappear.
You mean choosing people based on race and gender over merit is turning out to be a bad idea?
Whoever would have thought it?
My personal take is that there are either too many arts execs with personal investment in progressive identity politics or too much cowardice to say no to it. They will sink the ships then skip off claiming foul play.
There are holes in this story. These days, becoming a music director in a regional orchestra is not easy to acquire. Hundreds of candidates typically apply. So, wherever you are, congratulations. How have you been helping this orchestra and community evolve under your leadership? What are the finances like? Can you commission new music or be part of consortiums bringing new music to your city/community? Is there a young artist competition? Is there music in the schools? Do you bring guest artists to your orchestra and get them seen in your community to build audience awareness of their visit? Can you have mini festivals devoted to specific composers or local themes? There are more questions. Also, I know many conductors who are beloved in their communities and much prefer this to the in and out guest visits with orchestras. Are you leaning more toward global guest appearances? I hope this is helpful.
No holes visible. I know a young man who is truly gifted, and has already given up on even trying to have a career beyond the local community level.
Having my and reading the comments. This is better than. NETFLIX!
Dear Passed Over:
Your best hope is to move to Russia, where music is still music and not a platform for virtue signalling woke ideology. If you’re good, you’ll do well there. Of course you’ll need Russian fluency ASAP.
P.S. Ignore Alma’s advice. All self-help bromides and platitudes.
Don’t worry dear white male 30’s conductor, move to Asia they’ll love you there. They’ll even provide a female assistant to make tea and answer telephone and fan letters. And if you need healthcare they have young female nurses in white uniform to pamper you, same thing on their aeroplanes, young female stewardesses.
“learn to code”
– Joe Biden
“Go to work to make the solar panels”
– John Kerry
I’m sorry, but almost all young conductors are horrible nowadays…doesn’t matter female, male, white, black or anything that comes to your mind. Agencies play their games, including top world orchestras, giving fame to shity “conductors” (I might say stick holders), destroying music and thinking that they are some kinf of “Maestro” when they have no idea…and that’s the pure truth believe it or not
This shit into the classical music world should stop…sad…
The problem here is easier to understand if you think in levels. There is always room at the top – nothing is going to hold back a truly extraordinary talent. And at the bottom, neither wokeness nor the former old-boy network nor patronage is going to sustain a truly incompetent conductor for more than a year or two of gigs.
But the vast majority of conductor candidates are in between – hardworking, serious, prepared, but not extraordinarily gifted. And the world needs those – there are not enough geniuses to go around for all the performances that somebody has to conduct.
Some people in this overwhelmingly large category, with experience and maturity, may become great. But in early career scrambles, they are subject to cronyism, stereotyping, and favor-trading. A lot of decision-makers don’t really have highly developed musical judgment, and they need the help of “it just seems right” or even “it just looks right” to make their choices.
It has always been this way. Only the networks and influencers have changed. There’s been an assumption more or less forever that any reasonably good-looking Italian guy must be a good choice for leading an Italian opera. (Guess what? No.) There have always been Jewish guys of eastern-european roots who had access to the right circles and mentorship and got chances others simply couldn’t. Right now, a Finnish pedigree is an extra plus. And at the moment, if you’re female there is extra inclination to hire you so as to show off the institution’s progressive credentials. But again – this is not new, it’s just a new flavor on the same old menu. And again – it doesn’t apply to the best or the worst, and never did. Complaining about it is like complaining about the weather.
Glad to see so many experts here, regarding the field of conducting.
I’m a working conductor with a very specific skillset, so I’ve often been sought out due to that. In the last 4 years at least, I’ve been openly passed over for women and POC who have not the same level of skill or experience, leading to chaotic and unorganized situations with the hiring organizations–but it’s good press, apparently. Where I was once the first choice, I’m now the fourth or fifth, and it has not one thing (even admitted by the organizations!) with skills or knowledge. In any other situation, this would be a lawsuit.
The problem with many of the comments above is that they ignore the fact that every conductor is the same level. I’ve been fortunate enough to work my way up through a number of high level organizations, and there is a surprising amount of mediocrity that has been allowed in recent years. The fact that I see this in the highest levels as well as though I myself have been well past in recent years is disconcerting. These practices are much further than “giving opportunity” because the recipients of those opportunities are simply not ready for them. Also troubling is that “POC” does not mean -ALL- POC.
“Every conductor is *not* at the same level”
This might explain a bit.
I found an Interesting article for those in the know.
Marie Jacquot is a good example.
https://open.substack.com/pub/johnaxelrod/p/is-marie-jacquot-the-next-great-french?r=3m1of0&utm_medium=ios
I’ve had similar experiences as a conductor- but I’m now in my late forties- so I’ve well & truly had it!
Have you considered that the women picked over you were better than you? Maybe you just don’t cut it. Sorry!
Totally unlikely.
He is obviously the victim of discrimination. However, if he can get other jobs at the same level, he’d better take them. The only way up is to move to another country, change citizenship and change name, and come back as a foreigner. Or to change gender.