Some new Anglo-German musical terms

Some new Anglo-German musical terms


norman lebrecht

March 12, 2021

1 Kompianist
A composer who plays a bit

2 Geiger counter
Metronome for violinists

3 Dirgent
Very slow, morbid conductor


4 Konzertscheisster
Artists agent

5 Kontrabass
A fish served upside down

6 Fach off
Variable singer

(c) NL

Feel free to add more….


  • A.L. says:

    “Die Frau ohne Stimme” — Opera without voices

  • Rogerio says:

    The Messiah:
    The first Black American man that wins the Queen Elizabeth Violin Competition (A Black American Woman would be too easy).

    • Rogerio says:

      This is more along the lines of Mr. Lebrecht’s suggestion.
      Note that in German you can find words like;


      This (single word) would mean:
      The Syndrome Resulting form the Unsatisfaction which is Provoked by Jonas Kaufmann’s Singing.
      A word such as this would be created if the concept were frequently used.
      So I guess it exists already.

  • pianomike says:

    and the point of all this is…?

  • Gustavo says:


    Kranjan’s legacy

  • Andreas B. says:

    It must be my German non existing sense of humour …

    I’ll let a Danish genius add some musical word play at its best:

    A Mozart Opera

    Or, for some German speaking humour, I highly recommend (the Austrian/American) Georg Kreisler:

    Der Musikkritiker

  • Gary Freer says:

    Überhohen – Sir Simon Rattle

  • Wizard Fafnir says:

    Hundinger: An outstanding Wagnerian bass performance.

  • RW2013 says:

    “Soprano Elisabeth Schwarzkopf sings leider”
    (from an Australian newspaper)

  • Gustavo says:



  • Gustavo says:

    Faggot – a blow instrument

  • Gustavo says:

    Da Brat shits

  • Gustavo says:



  • fflambeau says:

    Yes, many of his tempos were slow but Otto Klemperer deserves better than this with his photo posted in this terrible article. He was one of the greatest conductors of all time and an acknowledged expert on Beethoven. Shame on these people who put together this nonsense.

  • Hmus says:

    Fleischkopf und Härtel – a not very bright publishing house.