All your dreams in one video: Bocelli meets Lola Astanova

All your dreams in one video: Bocelli meets Lola Astanova


norman lebrecht

May 16, 2020

Words fail.


  • V.Lind says:

    She’s far too thick with Trump for my taste.

  • julia Soret says:

    Tal para cual!

  • Jimbo says:


  • Elizabeth Owen says:

    Now you know as well as I do that you just have to wear f*** me shoes in order to play the piano!

  • Not my dreams at all! I prefere a show on the Korean tv of Yeol Eum Son or the documentaries on Youtube of the Concertgebouw about Mahler. It was released this week.

  • Jonathan Sutherland says:

    If words fail, clearly any vague semblance of musicality has failed La Lola. Again. The (thankfully brief) snippet of the second Chopin scherzo was a dogs breakfast of tasteless artifice and vulgar effect. Surely this pulchritudinous poseuse would enjoy a more appropriate career as a pin-up girl for absurd stilettos or silicone breast implants.

  • A.L. says:

    Deeply moving. Problem is the movement triggered by this is not of the heart but of the digestive system.

  • sam says:

    “Words fail.”

    Her pianism too.

    She doesn’t have the skills of Yuja.
    She doesn’t have the body of a Kardashian.

    So what’s her selling point, a middling combo?
    Is that enough to go beyond a niche presence on youtube?

    I’m not really interested in finding out.

    Onto the next click bait of the moment.

  • Elvira says:

    Hm…. one part talent and three parts “hutzpah”

  • Petros Linardos says:

    Coming up with a coherent argument about everything that is wrong with this clip will be intellectually challenging.

  • Dimsky says:

    Nice Austin-Healey.

    • allrelative says:

      I think the car scene would have meant more if she was driving…

    • John Marks says:

      My Godmother’s husband had the identical Healey, but that was back circa 1962 (he had picked it up used). It was such a lovely car, but there was always something going wrong.

      For one horrified moment, I thought that Bocelli was the driver!

      Pity I don’t have the bandwidth here to tell the story I heard ages ago about Loomis McGlohan and George Shearing; but, the smart people here can probably figure it out!!!



  • Rustier spoon says:

    Nice car…

  • SSD says:

    Because of the subject, I think it’s appropriate to ask a shallow, irrelevant question: is it just me or does she look like Jennifer Lopez in the photo where she’s wearing the metallic lizard print…headdress?

    • yujafan says:

      I wish she was Jennifer Lopez, at least there would be something worth watching and she would have credible performance values. Failing that, dip Juja naked in yogurt and smother her in chocolate buttons and it would still be in better taste

  • Bruce says:

    Say what you like about the quality of his singing, he’s always been genuine & sincere at what he does. It’s a bit sad to see him involved with something this tacky. I can’t imagine him saying yes to this if he wasn’t blind.

    • Petros Linardos says:

      Bocelli can hear. So what does this tell us about his musical standards?

    • Saxon Broken says:

      Yes, Bocelli also tries, at least to be a decent person (even if his judgement of who to hang out with often fails him). He does what he does, and many people enjoy his performances. I don’t think he really has any pretensions about his level of talent. And I think many so-called artists would do well to learn from the fact he knows his role is to ensure the audience enjoys the show.

  • Adam Stern says:

    “All my dreams”, eh? Fortunately, my subconscious doesn’t go in those directions, although I may have a nightmare or two courtesy of this video.

  • Ainslie says:

    Oh. My. Gawd.

  • Old Man in the Midwest says:

    Hope Bocelli wasn’t driving the car.

    Love the heels. She can be my collaborative pianist any time she wants to be.

  • Ludwig's Van says:

    Oh, dear Low-la! How low must you go? T & A are poor substitutes for musicianship and artistry. But, if those attributes are the only tools you’ve got…

  • yujafan says:

    In the name of all that is musical, this is just awful.

    • Rustier spoon says:

      Beyond awful and rather pointless too, apart from the car, the horse and the lovely scenery…

  • Eric A. says:

    Just here for the comments, which provide comfort to the 23 seconds of chilling aural abuse above. Sad!

  • Luca says:

    If she was ugly people would be praising her to the skies.

    • M2N2K says:

      Which people? It is very easy to check by listening to the recording without looking at the screen. To make sure of my own impressions, I gave this a try and – believe it or not – to my ears her playing sounded just as pianistically mediocre and musically tasteless as it did when experienced together with her usually rather aggressive visual “stimulation“.

    • Jon Barrett says:

      100% agree!! The hypocrisy, pomposity and mind-blowing jealousy of all the obvious two-bit “experts” and failed “musicians” gathered here is where words truly fail! This girl has done more to keep classical music alive and relevant today than any of these arrogant self-important losers. And the inexplicable hate and slander promulgated here only further confirms how extraordinary this girl really is.

  • HugoPreuss says:

    And by “dream” you really mean nightmare?

  • FrauGeigerin says:

    Anything that has wannabe opera singer Bocelli and not-so-special pianist Astanova is closer to a nightmare thank to a pleasant dream.

  • Pianofortissimo says:

    That was a great, well-balanced combination of singer and pianist.

  • M2N2K says:

    To my ears, his “singing” sounds even worse than her piano playing: the one and only positive vocal quality that he used to have – marginally pleasant sweetness of his voice – is now completely gone and there is practically nothing left.
    It must not be easy to appear tasteless next to Lola Astanova, but the pair of dancers in this video manages to “succeed” in that challenging task triumphantly.

  • HypocrisySquared says:

    Oddly enough, I opened up this post just after trying to listen to Luisa Miller from the Met (2018) on TV. Placido Domingo massacres and mangles and mashes any last semblance of vocal or musical or stage integrity, and I found myself screaming silently with rage at how far we have fallen from the standards of old, standards which the former incarnation of Domingo set. So, when I see and hear the tacky, soft-porn musical carnage that is Astanova and the not-even-worth-adjectives Boccelli, I think to myself, how damned hypocritical of the classical world to snub these two hapless imposters while admitting the flailing, ageing, simply awful Domingo to our elite stages as a strangled cat of a “baritone”. And this is the Met, Salzburg, Covent Garden, Vienna etc etc etc. So few people care anymore about what great art is. It’s all about money. Sadly, coronavirus will probably only leave the richest standing, meaning our world will be infected by this kind of disgusting commercial vomit, peddled by unspeakable tacky, tasteless promoters like David Foster, for years to come. So, recognise the splinter in your own eye, classical world. Your hypocrisy is stunning.

  • Meyer's Beer says:

    Has anyone ever known Mme. Lola to play a major work from beginning to end – i.e., a sonata or concerto? If not, she appears to be little more than a dilettante in spiked heels.

    • M2N2K says:

      And if some day she does play “a major work from beginning to end”, would that make her a great artist? No, what counts is the way she plays it. If I am not mistaken, none of us – certainly not I – has ever heard Joseph Hassid play “a major work from beginning to end”, but that does not prevent us from recognizing that he was one of the finest violinistic talents of last century.

    • John Borstlap says:

      The reason why she is not playing pieces to the end is that her efforts and excitement tend to cause bits to flip out of their enclosures.

  • Fiddlist says:

    Foster’s truly gone off the deep end and become a Sith Lord of the Bolshoi.